We must overcome this bad habit:
Showing Superiority
Flaunting superior wisdom and judgment challenges your child to a contest and arouses defences quickly.
Most children with motivation and confidence will not hear what a parent says without a rebuttal; nor will they consider using any advice, regardless of how sound, without some discussion.
Your child is busy with developmental stages where they are learning to think - they are practicing justifying their viewpoints. They can't really hear you yet.
The confident child is challenged to compete with you when you show your superiority.
The child without confidence becomes even more dependent and weak.
Examples of showing superiority:
Preaching
Moralising
Lecturing
Advising
Using logic
Diagnosing
"Every person should get as much education as possible to be a good citizen"
"You must work harder and stop dating so much to get good grades"
"Have you ever considered your future? How will you earn a living?"
"You just want to have a good time now but haven't thought seriously about the consequences"
Parents need to teach their children values, ideals, and goals.
Parents are frequently asked by children for information about life and its problems.
During these teaching moments teach with sensitivity. Back off when resistence is aroused.
The best teaching moments occur when neither teacher nor student is emotionally upset about a problem.
From "Becoming a Better Parent" LDS Social Services
BETTER PARENTING - BE PREPARED: If you fail to plan and prepare, you ARE preparing and planning to fail. I love my four children! I would have liked to parent them better. This is some of what I wish I had been able to know thirty or forty years ago! I hope this helps my younger friends.
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