SUMMARIZE - Let them know you heard their important information and feelings.
SUMMARIZE - content - theirs
SUMMARIZE - feelings - theirs
If you do it well they will carry on talking.
If you do it well you will have been consentrating on them
If you do it well you will use words like:
"Now let me see if I have understood you... You said... you felt..."
"This is what I am gathering so far... (content and feelings)"
Listening carefully enough to be able to summarize what they say shows acceptance, builds confidence, and greatly improves communication.
Next time you have a discussion with someone about religion or politics - or other controversial subject - practice summarizing your oponent's content and feelings... See the positive effect your summary has on the person who is speaking. He/she may be willing to listen to your opinion and point of view.
BETTER PARENTING - BE PREPARED: If you fail to plan and prepare, you ARE preparing and planning to fail. I love my four children! I would have liked to parent them better. This is some of what I wish I had been able to know thirty or forty years ago! I hope this helps my younger friends.
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